Uno scherzo con Nuova Luna

Disgracing Vampires everywhere...

So on behalf of Transylvanians everywhere, I'd like to call out the Twilight series. That's not how we do it. We don't suck the blood out of people. We may slowly kill our family members with intolerably boring stories or peculiarly horrible guilt trips, but never once do we pierce the skin. We leave that to the Hungarians.

Anyway, I was wandering around the Italian YouTube site, and I found this video. Even if you don't understand Italian, please watch it. It's hilarious. Huge spoof, great physical comedy.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Vampiro" Yazge

Ti Amo, Lucy

You got some 'splain-in' to do!

I was trying to avoid studying for my Business Law final, and I found this video. Apparently Lucy came to Italy too. I don't know why I wasn't offered to stomp grapes with an old peasant woman, but I'd like to think that my feet could do some serious damage. Maybe work in some choreography too. Anyway, enjoy the clip! I did!


Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Loves Lucy" Yazge

Michele, Davide, e Galileo

He's starting to let himself go...

So my apologies. Apparently there are five of you that read my little stories - 6 if I include my mother. That's just judging by yesterday's comments and such. Google analytics keeps telling me that there are roughly 15-30 people who visit every day, depending on what I write about/how often I write. But I think it's just lying to me so I don't feel bad.

Regardless! I've been trying to soak up the last bits of Florence while I'm here. I went to La Galleria dell'Academia on Friday, and started off by perusing some old religious panels. I quickly got bored. If it's not Byzantine, I'm not really impressed, and even then I can only take so many Madonnas with Child before it becomes monotonous. So I wandered into the next gallery for something completely different: Robert Maplethorpe. I know people think his photos are distasteful and pornographic, but when you look at them in the context of what he was trying to accomplish, it's completely different. (Click here to see selections) It was all about form, and displaying real human bodies that can live up to the standard set forth in sculpture and other forms of art. It was about all of us being able to be just as beautiful as the David - without photoshopping him into obesity, like above. Anyway, I really enjoyed the exhibit.

As soon as I left the Maplethorpe exhibit, I ran right into the David. It took my breath away. It's SO life-like. I don't even know how to describe it, except to say that I kept waiting for him to reach out and pick me up in the palm of his hand, that's how alive he seemed.

Yesterday, in keeping with my goal of marinading myself in Florence, I went to La Basilica della Santa Croce. I just went because everyone told me that I should. They all failed to mention that Galileo, Michelangelo, Machiavelli, Rossini, and Marconi are all entombed there. Go figure. Not exactly religious icons - in fact Galileo was convicted of heresy and put under house arrest by the Pope (unjustly, but still). It was odd to see all these cultural icons in the church. Awesome, but odd. Especially since I've walked past the church a hundred times and had no idea until yesterday that it housed some of the greatest individuals in Italian history.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Sculpted di Dio" Yazge

CENTO!!!

100 posts, and I'm still this adorable...

Yup! This is my 100th post! It feels like a lot more, but that could be because I'm tired/my brain is threatening to pack its bags and leave.

It's really good timing for my 100th post, the end of my semester in Italy. An end of an era, really. Let's take a look back and remember the wonderful topics we've discussed:

Travel: Paris, London, Italy, beyond...

Crazy People: Oprah, Lindsay Lohan, Berlusconi, and more!

Food: Turkey, Waffles, Risotto...

Music: Opera, British Pop Stars, and singing nuns...

I've also come the realization (after 100 posts, and roughly 200 days) that you can't start off famous. That's too easy, and not quite as fun. I'd again like for all of us to look to the great Kathy Griffin for inspiration. You must claw, bite, scratch, and shamelessly self-promote yourself to the top. Publicity stunts, gimmicks, and first amendment lawyers are all essential to this process, and I fully intend to take full advantage of the fact that I (normally) live in a metropolitan area that hosts all the country's major networks. So when you see my mug shot on the 6 o'clock news, you can say "Oh, well I was reading his blog before it was cool." Thank you, all 4 of you, who read this and understand the necessary steps of obscurity and infamy that eventually lead to fame. This is for you. Well, really it's about me getting famous, but you get the idea.

Now get excited for all the good stuff to come! Here's just a list of some of the things you can look forward to in the coming days, weeks, and months:

• Christmas Countdown!
• My reintegration into the US (shame-based Wal-mart excursions and all)
• Classic American Movie marathons
• Exploring the outer boroughs
• World Cup anticipation
• Matt Looks for a Job: an in depth analysis of procrastination at its best
• Ridiculous videos possibly featuring Baby Lexi
• and MUCH MUCH MORE!!!!

Did that get you excited enough? Good. Because it should.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Centurian" Yazge

Wireless Diavolo

This company is Satan... just look at the red.

SO! I was in the airport on my way home from Paris last weekend, and miraculously there was an wireless channel that was open. It didn't require a password or anything. Go figure. So I was like "dude, I'm totally using this". Mala idea.

This morning I opened my e-mail to find one from boingo, an evil, conniving company that probably kicks puppies. PUPPIES! I got charged $20 for less than an hour's worth of wireless! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? I'm seeing red right now. I'm debating whether or not I should call and complain. I'm sure they're going to fall back on some fine print nonsense. I used their service, as in actually signed up for and paid for and hour's worth of service when I was in JFK. They told me how much it was going to be, and showed me the bill before I clicked the "I agree" button. But there was nothing like that on my screen. I doubt they'll agree to give me any money back... Bastards.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Wire- (and $20)-less" Yazge

Nove

Awesomeness in movie form.

This film, based on the original Broadway musical, isn't slated to come out until late January... but that hasn't stopped me from watching the trailer 20 times over, hoping that the next it will be the actual movie. I'm not sure if it's my newly-developed affinity for Italy, or my overwhelming desire to take Dame Judy Dench out for a night on the town. Either way, I'm anxious for this movie to come out. Anyone want to go with?

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Cinema Italiano" Yazge

Avviciniamo la fine

Thessaloniki gave a whole new meaning to the word "portly"

So close to the end of the semester. I'm only in Italy for another 10 days, and I'm trying to find the right way to describe the cocktail of emotions that I'm feeling right now. I'm pretty sure it's a vodka-Red Bull. The vodka, clearly European, is making me sleepy. I'm trying to make it to the end of semester and get everything done, get my A's, etc. But it also make me want to hang out. I know I'm going to miss Europe a lot. Firenze and Italy as well, but moreso the general idea of Europe. There's still so much I haven't seen. I was going to go to Rome this weekend, but after looking at my credit card statement this morning, I've decided that maybe a relaxing final weekend in Florence might be a better idea. I never made it to Spain. I won't even fly through Germany, nor did I get anywhere near Scandinavia. Even after going to Paris twice in the course of a month, I feel like I've only just begun to see it, let alone the rest of France.

But then the Red Bull kicks in. I'm really really REALLY ready to get back to the family, and to a full-sized bed, and the convenience of life in America. Oh, and functioning plumbing. I didn't share this earlier, but on Thanksgiving night the city of Florence shut off the water. For the ENTIRE CITY. They said there was something that needed fixing and that it was midnight so that seemed like a good time. Then yesterday I get a call from Jamie while I'm at work that our bathroom had flooded. Our ceiling was leaking. I'd like to take a moment to point out that we live on the third floor of a five floor building, and our bathroom has no external walls... so despite what the Italian plumber may have told us, it was not due to the torrential rain outside. If it was, the Italians need to learn a thing or two about masonry.

Posting will most likely be sporadic for the next week or so. It's finals time, and I'm lucky to even be awake right now. Those of you who are used to talking to me on a daily basis know that I disappear during midterms and finals. But while I'm gone, I'll give you a topic: What should my blog focus on when I get back to the States?

Discuss.


Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Vodka-Red Bull" Yazge