It's a dairy kind of day!

This is the face I get when cheese is around...

How I managed to live in this city for three years and never enter the 3rd Ave. cheese store until today is a mystery that may never be solved. It also may be the most genius store I have ever laid eyes on. Here's a few shots of the shop:

  

Outside and In...

Everything is so ridiculously cheap. I don't even understand how they can sell it for that little. I got the biggest wedge of brie for $3. And not disgusting brie either. This was Presidente, which granted isn't gourmet, but it's a legit hunk of cheese. I also got goat cheese for $2? On what planet. I don't think it could even be that cheap if someone gave you the goat for free and then set you loose to make cheese. This could be bad for my bank account though. Lots of small purchases add up. As do saturated fats... 

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Formaggio" Yazge

Betty White can be my cougar anytime...

BETTY!!!

It's true! I can't wait. This is going to be beyond epic. Betty White hosting SNL is the best idea in entertainment since the media collectively decided to no longer care about Lindsay Lohan. I could say more about my love for Betty White, but I think this video says it all. Oh, and she's a cougar. Hot.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Betty-lovin'" Yazge

New York Red Bulls

If your team is named after a drink made from a chemical found in bull testicles, you've got to be good, right?

Yeah. Little known fact: taurine, one of the energy-inducing ingredients in Red Bull, can be found in bull testicles. We'll skip over the fact that for food use it's chemically synthesized, and jump right to the part where I tell you how awesome the soccer game was yesterday.

IT WAS AWESOME!

I went with a group of people from my building, and we had a really good time. Their new stadium is really nice, albeit in the middle of absolute nowhere. Harrison, New Jersey doesn't really have a whole lot going for it except the Red Bulls and what appeared to be a pretty killer tuna sandwich stand. The game itself was really good. I have never seen US soccer fans so riled up in all my life. They were cheering, and beating on drums, and some guy was even playing a horn at one point? They didn't stop making noise the entire game. Philly put up a good fight, but in the end the Red Bulls won. Three cheers for the home team! Also, three cheers to the guy who was asked to leave because he was throwing paper airplanes from his seat. Several of them landed on the field, and one hit some dude in the head. Don't worry, the stadium security walkie-talkied all over that, and all was righted. 

I'm really excited to go back for the international friendly the stadium is hosting next month; Turkey vs. the Czech Republic. Should be pretty good, and with tickets at $30 a pop, they're easy on my wallet too!

Ciao Bella!

Matteo

Reading, 'riting, and Sniffing Jackets

Acting with James Franco Episode 3: Scene Work from James Franco

Actors act, and actors sniff jackets.... Sniff it.

So I have my reading at the Creative Writing House tonight. Well, it's not just me, but let's just blow over that detail. Anyway, in order to get in the right frame of mind, I thought it would be good to delve deep in the acting world for some serious pointers. It's one thing to write a story, and it's a completely different ball game to be asked to read it in front of people. Plus, it's been so long since my star performance as Hispanic #4 in the Terre Haute Community Theater's production of West Side Story. Luckily enough James Franco has his own series of online acting lessons. Boy, did I learn a lot.

Also, if you're interested in coming tonight, the reading is at 58 W 10th St. It starts at 7pm sharp, so be sure to show up a little early!

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Sniffs Jackets" Yazge

Dans la Défense de la Reine

Love her.

I think of myself as a fairly intelligent person, capable of deciphering between fact and fiction. However, when it comes to movies, I prefer to imagine that everything presented to me is 100% solid fact. My interaction with Sophia Copolla's Marie Antoinette last night is a perfect example. For instance, I think that it's probably very likely that the real Queen of France listened to the lovable hipsters, MGMT. That just makes sense to me. Or that she thought that everything in Versailles was ridiculous. Because, honestly, if the sense of decorum/protocol was anything like the way it was represented in the movie, it was beyond ridiculous. Who really needs a crowded room full of people to help you change out of your nightie? Well, probably Anna Nicole Smith, may she rest in peace.

Here's another thing: Marie got a bad wrap. I really felt for her. It would SUCK to get yanked from not just your home, but your home country, and married off to a social moron at the age of 17. AND she had to leave her puppy behind. The world is a cruel, cruel place. Not only that, he lame-o husband didn't even want to sleep with her. I'm sorry, but when Kirsten Dunst is in the bed next to you, you step up and do your husbandly duties. It's just that simple. Also, I would have much preferred they not behead her. That was just a poor choice on their part.

After watching the movie, I'm now in a huge Paris mood. Edith Piaf is playing on my iPod, and I'm off in search of a baguette and brie. Wish me luck mes amis!

Au revoir!

Mathieu "Mon Dieu!" Yazge

Ke$ha = Genius

There are no words...

OK. So there are a lot of words. I would like to start of with a disclaimer that I love Ke$ha and think she is a entertainment genius. That being said, this performance is ape shit crazy. The two are not mutually exclusive. I'm actually just really jealous that I don't have large amounts of black-light paint on my body as well. However, the entire time, I couldn't help but be reminded of the Kelis "Acapella " video. That's actually a really good thing in my book.

I don't want to finish this post without saying how brilliant it is that she compares being love to being all hopped up on cocaine or something. Or withdrawal? I don't know. I've never done drugs, but something about needing a fix and being addicted just sounds a lot like love. That and banging your head against a wall. 

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Love is my Drug" Yazge

The Muppets and the Skateboarding Dog!

Above and below: awesome viral videos from the Muppets.

So in honor of one of my friends, Bobby, adopting his first dog today, I decided that I would share these videos from the Muppets. They have some hilarious stuff on their YouTube page, some of which I've posted on here before. Now if I'm to be truly impressed with Bobby's new dog, he better teach her something cool like how to skateboard. But since that's already been done, I've compiled a list of other activities he could train his dog to do:

• Tap dance
• Solve the energy crisis
• Raise three children while working, and still manage to get dinner on the table by 6 every night
• Brave her way through Middle Earth, befriending elves and hobbits along the way, in order to destroy the one ring that has the power to destroy everything. (This one would have to include some lava-safety training as well. You don't want the dog falling in after the ring.)
• Figure out how many licks it actually takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Muppetto" Yazge

Kudos to Kotex

Don't all these angles make me seem dynamic?

For those of you who don't know me that well, I'm a marketing major. And I love stuff like this. It's the type of tongue-in-cheek advertising that literally makes me laugh out loud - not to mention that I giggle like a small child whenever anyone talks about feminine hygiene. But let's all be honest with ourselves, it's pretty funny (when you're not presently dealing coping with feminine hygiene, or so I hear).

So beware, next time you see a commercial that appeals to you a little too much. Are you just going to buy it because the woman on the screen is a racially ambiguous 18-24 year-old? Is she going to ask you to buy something now? Does she have good hair? You're not listening to me anymore, are you? Don't worry. I'm not either.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Because I'm Wearing White Pants" Yazge

SEASON PREMIER!

I'm baaaaaaaack!

The crowds have spoken: WE NEED MORE UGLY AMERICAN! Now, to clarify for legal purposes (I don't need a lawsuit on my hands here) "the crowds" is actually my cousin Victoria... But still. One's a crowd, two's a party, and Three's Company? Come and knock on our door? I feel I may be mixing metaphors. The point is I was gone for a while, and now I'm not as gone as I used to be. Chalk it up to my general exhaustion, midterms, or aphasia. You pick.

I originally wanted to time my return with the return of Glee. That didn't happen so much. But did you see that episode??? Genius. And apparently so are the characters. I quote, "Did you know that dolphins are just gay sharks?" Yes, America. This is our future. And I love every minute of it. (As should you!) If the regular gleefulness of the show weren't enough, we are getting a WHOLE SPANKING EPISODE OF MADONNA. Just try and tell me you're not excited. If you're not, just watch this. It will convince you. God, I miss the 80's.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Has Gleefully Returned" Yazge

Wino Wednesday: On a Thursday

I don't know, what's amatta with you?

A Wednesday went by without a Wino Wednesday post. Surprisingly, I woke up this beautiful Thursday morning and the world was still here. PHEWWW! Now that we know the world indeed will go on despite my blogging activity (or lack thereof), I'd like to cheers the unconventional and the non-time-specific!

I bought this bottle of Casamatta last week, relying on it to help me read some of my Italian books over the weekend. As you can guess, the wine is gone and those books aren't very much further read. But it's the thought that counts, which raises a good point. When you're looking for good pairings for wine, don't always limit yourself to food. Other inanimate objects work just as well: books, movies, magazines, taxidermy animals. But perhaps the best pairing is another person. I really felt like a 90-year-old ex-professor sitting around in my apartment sipping on a Tuscan wine and reading in a different language. It was a very good wine though. I'd seriously recommend it, and if you can get yourself to Astor Wines, it's on sale for $10/bottle.

I was discussing my propensity for old-man activities before class started yesterday, and how I stand in stark contrast to one of my friends who is planning on getting married in the next year. Rather glibly I said that I couldn't even think about marriage, and as far as I was concerned I was planning on dying alone; I'd already taken all the proper steps to make sure that happened, and it really seemed like my best option at this point. A couple people overheard and laughed along with us. I'm assuming it was 'with', and not 'at' me. The point is don't drink alone. You'll die alone.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Die-alone" Yazge