GLEEEEE!

Because "Glee" is the same in all languages!

I'm SO proud of the Italians for taking to Glee. The premier of the first episode was on Christmas Day, and then like they did in the US, they're going to roll out the full first season later (January 21st). This officially combines two of my favorite things: Italy and Glee! I'd like to thank Mark Kania for posting the link for the Italian TV commercials to Facebook. And I guess I should thank Tracey Lucas for having a Facebook wall where those videos could be posted?

Oh, and for everyone State-side, you need to go buy the first season of Glee. Stat. It just hit stores today, and I bought it this morning after I got my drivers license. (It's a long story for another day, but the Cliffnotes version is that I wasn't a licensed driver for a stretch there, and now I am again.) I suggest you put it on very loud, and sing and dance along in your underwear. Unless you're my parents. And then you should just appreciate it in silence. Fully clothed silence.

Below is a video of an AMAZING viral marketing gig they did for the premier of the show in Rome. It's kind of like the Sound of Music one in that train station in Belgium. Definitely worth a watch. Also, anyone interested in recreating this - only better - should get ahold of me (and a choreographer) ASAP.






Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Glee-full!" Yazge

I giovani e gli irrequieti

I do. Oh boy, do I do...

So more hilarity ensued today at the gym. Have you ever been on a treadmill when something utterly ridiculous comes on the TVs that are on the wall in front of you? And you start laughing like a moron? And almost fall off the treadmill because you're laughing so hard and not paying attention to the rapidly moving conveyor belt beneath you? The Young and the Restless have never looked so good. Or dangerous.  Or Bold and Beautiful... wait. Different show.

I couldn't even really tell much of what was going on. There were subtitles on the TV, so I could read it... but there was a delay. So when the old lady was talking to her daughter, who we later find out isn't her biological daughter, I was reading the dialogue between the baby-faced male lead and his poorly makeup-ed baby mama on the plane that was plummeting from the sky. Apparently her daughter is still alive. Though I didn't need subtitles to figure that one out. He had to write it down on a conveniently-placed piece of paper, because apparently actresses with too much makeup can't hear things when their in a crashing plane.

Ciao Bella

Matteo "The Bold and Restless" Yazge

Non è simplice...

I'd explain, but it's complicated...

So on my way home from church today, I get a call from my dad saying that he's at the gas station down the street, where my aunt and grandmother were in a stalled car. They were supposed to leave today, but apparently their car thought otherwise. On the bright side it meant more time with both of them and a trip to the movies.

We decided to go see It's Complicated. First off, Meryl is amazing. No wonder this role got a Golden Globe nomination. She is one of the most versatile actors I can think of. Not only can she play any role, but she can run the whole gamut of emotions in a single role. In It's Complicated she plays the mom, the old divorcee, stoned, a dating woman, all of it. I'm pretty convinced they actually smoked weed for the shoot, because she was way too hilarious to have been sober.   All in all it was a great story, mainly about how complicated love is... hence the title. I really appreciated that at no point during the movie did it turn trite or cliché.

Finally, a huge nod to John Krasinski, who played the son-in-law. He was really funny without being Jim from The Office. It's nice to see that he (and the rest of the cast) could keep up with the Streep!


Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Complicated" Yazge

Si pensi di poter ballare?

This should have been the winner... Jakob.

So, I realize that I am WAY behind on the cultural bandwagon, but I just need to discuss So You Think You Can Dance for a minute...

My sister got me addicted 3 days ago, and we tore through half a season on our DVR since then. Granted this is coming like 2 weeks too late, but I'd like to file a formal complaint with "them", because there is no way in HELLLLLLLL that that Russell moron should have won. No way. The guy can't do anything except fist pump... Snooki from Jersey Shore could out dance him. Pathetic. And can talk about his supposed "knee injury"? Notice how once he was announced the winner, he was miraculously better? Yeah, apparently when you get an undeserved victory, the Baby Jesus miraculously gives you a new knee to go with it. If you give a moose a muffin...

The real winner here (besides the show, dance, and America, according to the cracked out judges) is Jakob. First of all, he spells his name with a "k". Automatic win. Second, he can actually dance. All of it. He doesn't think he can dance. He can dance. And he's classy... he would never rip his shirt off and fall down on his knees, scream random noises, scream about his many girlfriends, and refuse to get off the floor even after the host repeatedly asked him. Unlike Russell. Just saying.

You just wait, FOX. You'll be getting a strongly worded letter from the Yazge siblings. Also, Cat Deeley, watch your botoxed back. Baby Lexi got some words to share with you.

Ciao Bella

Matteo "Furioso" Yazge

Il Natale è qui

COOOOOKIES!

It's been a loooong day. It all started with my mom waking me up and 30 minutes later me driving her to the store. We braved Dellalo's, the AMAZING Italian deli/grocer/bakery here. It almost compares to Italy itself... almost. We ended up buying something like $50 worth of different cheeses. Insane. And then my mom has the nerve to ask if we needed any more.

Got home, baked some Colac - traditional Romanian egg bread. Went to the gym for an hour, came home and showered, ate, then made a batch of tiramisu. Cleaned the kitchen, started cleaning my room. I've found that cleaning and getting organized are two completely different things. Cleaning actually gets things clean. Organizing makes everything horrifically messier, and things only start to get clean if you have enough energy to see the process the whole way through. I haven't finished yet, but I'm hoping maybe tomorrow?

Oh, and then I had to make Christmas cookies, because the dough I made the other night was going to go bad. I feel so domesticated. Lex was supposed to decorate them, but she's passed out on the floor in the living room. We're watching The Holiday. The best movie ever, basically. So now I'm going to go pass out in my mess of a room, and hopefully wake up early enough to clean it before the family gets here tomorrow!

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "the Christmas Elf" Yazge

Più Cinema, Per Sempre

Ooooh... blue.

I'm a sucker for shiny things and bright colors. So you can guess how much I enjoyed Avatar. The graphics were beyond stunning, and as soon as I got over being ill from the 3D glasses, I felt like I was in the movie. The world they constructed was phenomenally gorgeous, and the story gave off such a Mother-Earth-tree-hugger vibe that I wanted to go live in the Amazon.

However, there were a few flaws. I understood the whole parallel to US military involvement around the world, but they took it a bit far at times. One of the characters even says things like "shock and awe" or "fight terror with terror". Don't get me wrong; I sympathize with the overall message: don't rape and pillage native peoples for energy and stuff. But it got a tad Glenn Beck at times. Granted he would have been arguing that the humans should have been killing every tree-hugger in sight, but that's beside the point. Like Glenn Beck, the movie had moments where you didn't care what the message was because the delivery is so distasteful that you just wanted to turn it off.

Which brings me to the gym. While I still had a throbbing headache after the movie, I'm pretty sure that Glenn Beck being on the TV while I was on the treadmill only made things worse. I couldn't move without feeling like my head was going to explode. My cure? Tea, pad thai, and National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Tree-hugging" Yazge

Zucchero e Cognac

Is she:

A) Filled with the Joy of cooking?

B) On a sugar high?

C) Hopped up on cognac?

D) All of the above

So I was bored this afternoon and started thumbing through my mom's copy of Mastering the Art of French Cooking (MtAoFC) hoping to find something to make for Christmas morning. My immediate thought was fish, but right before the section labelled "poisson" is a passage on crêpes. Apparently, according to Julia, you can make this monstrosity of a crêpe tower by layering them with different fillings. One of them involves lots of sugar, creme, and cognac. Very exciting. I always knew I loved Julia, but now that I know she's a fan of the booze, she's just move ahead of Lady Fonda on my list of favorite oldies but goodies.

But as far as Christmas morning, I've settled on Gâteau de Crêpes à la Florentine. Fitting, no? What with all the living in Florence for three and half months this year... It involves layering crêpes with cream cheese, spinach, and mushroom filling. If it sounds gross at first, just think of it as a huge French lasagna. Bon Appetit!

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Full o' Crêpe" Yazge

I lipidi e come sono grasso

This is how I feel...

So I realize that The Ugly American is on the verge of cardiac arrest, but - no offense to those actually in cardiac arrest - I may be soon also. I have seriously ballooned since coming home.

When I first got home, I thought things were going great. I got my gym membership, I stocked the fridge with veggies, fruit, and organic skim milk, there's Kashi overflowing from the pantry, and I still fit into all my clothes after putting them through their first drier cycle in months. But then things started to go downhill.

I discovered the stock piles of ice cream out in the garage freezer. Only 5 minutes after leaving the gym on Wednesday, I stopped and got double chocolate turtle custard.... effectively blowing my 5 mile run. This morning? I ate 7 cinnamon buns. It's bad news bears. As I was getting into the shower today I noticed that I have a visibly protruding pocket of fat on my lower abs, a "pancia" as they call it in Italian. 

Now I realize that this is no reason to go alerting the media, and Taylor is probably rolling her eyes at me as she reads this, using choice words like "manorexic" mingled with four letter words. But after being able to eat anything I wanted in Europe, then coming home and having such a stark, fast reaction to the difference in food/activity, it's really disturbing. To play things safe, I think we need to put a padlock on the ice cream drawer in the freezer.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Pavarotti-ponch" Yazge

Mia Sorella!

Shmappy Berfday!

So yesterday was baby Lex's birthday. I don't know why I call my sister "baby Lex", because she just turned 16. "That's just something I do," as she puts it.

Anyway, my present to her was a 30% stake in my car. She's allowed to drive it while I'm away at school, but by no means is she the controlling owner. And as she now has some of the privileges of being part-owner of the Jeep, she will also have certain duties (*cough*beingmydesignateddriver*cough*) to go along with it.

My other gift to her was allowing her to let me get sucked into another mindless vampire show. I already watch True Blood, but now she's got me watching Vampire Diaries. That's right. I've caught the VD. It's a horribly written show with a trite plot and stereotypical character development, but it's mindless garbage about "teenage" vampires, aka exactly what I need after a long semester. Plus, my family is from Transylvania afterall. I'll let you know how it goes. Ian Somerhalder is in it, so it can't be totally bunk.


Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Vamp-vatchin" Yazge

I miei venti dolari

This is back in my pocket.

So, a week or so ago I told y'all about my experience with a little company called Boingo wireless. In short, I got charged $20 for an hour's worth of wireless without being told I was going to be charged, and then I was mad about it. I then shared how a women from Boingo's customer service department got ahold of me. Well, after some discussion, they have graciously refunded my $20! And really, what's better than getting back $20? I mean, getting back $50, but I don't think that was in the cards...

It's nice to know that there are companies out there who are willing to look out for their customers. I was seriously considering signing up for their monthly service, mainly because it gives you wireless in every Starbucks in the US. It's very tempting, but then I remembered that Starbucks coffee tastes like dirt, and all my favorite coffee houses in Manhattan have free wireless. But if you like drinking caffeinated dirt, you should consider getting an account with Boingo!

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Bucks Back" Yazge

La Palestra

Get ready to eat your heart out Janie, I just got a gym membership...

Oh it feels so good to be a member at a gym again. And the lady who I signed up with was so nice. I was supposed to have my school ID since it was a membership for college students home for the holidays, but she let me sign up without it. Of course there was some witty banter back and forth, especially when I forgot how to write the date the American way... MO/DA/YEAR.

This was also a problem when I went to get a new Social Security Card. For the record, I didn't lose it, my parents did. But not the point. So I mosey through the front door, and there's an 5,000 year old security guard standing there. He asks me very abruptly if I was carrying any concealed weapons, knives, lighters, etc. When I answered no, he told me to turn my phone off. They take security very seriously at the SS Office of Greensburg, Pennsylvania. I really think it's to protect the workers from themselves. If I had to go to that office every day I'd probably want to shoot myself too. Anyway, I had the same day/month problem there too. The guy probably thought I was a moron. At least I'll be a skinny moron after my membership at the gym!

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Lean Routine" Yazge

Alla fine, alla casa

Gotcha!

So I'm home, and I'd love to talk about how much I'm enjoying it and Christmas and Glee and blah blah blah.... but I think that this needs to be shared first:

SOMEONE PUNCHED BERLUSCONI IN THE FACE. You thought it was bad when that dude threw a shoe at Bush? This guy all out through a punch at the Prime Minister, while holding what witnesses said was a replica of the Duomo. Well, if God can't punch you in the face, I think this is the closest you're going to get!


Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Bashed in the Face" Yazge

Non è la fine, solo è l'inizio.

Tomorrow is the last time I open my front door to this...

AH! It's over! I can't believe I've spent over 100 days in Italy. In less than 24 hours I'll be taking off for JFK, the second of three flights I'll take to get back to the 'burgh. I'm not exactly thrilled at the idea of being in transit more than 20 hours, and you bet that I'm going to need my "nervous pills" to handle that many flights in such a short period of time.

I was trying to figure out what I could say to give some sense of finality, of bringing everything together. I'd like to blame my lack of words on the fact that I still have two finals left to take before I leave campus today. It's really more because I don't have it in me to be sappy and inspirational. Yes, I'm going to get back to Greensburg (a cultural wasteland in comparison to Europe) and be happy to see my family. It's going to be hard to cope with the fact that I can't find amazing gelato, or jetset to Paris for the weekend, or speak Italian to anyone, well speak it and have anyone understand me. But - in typical Ugly American style - I'd like to point out the things that will make my transition to the US easier. If there's anything I've learned from Oprah and Dr. Phil, it's that pointing out the flaws in your relationship will help make the breakup process faster and less regrettable:

1. Gym Membership: I will no longer be a lard-ass. I will be on a treadmill at least every other day, doing core exercises, and hopefully lifting weights in an attempt to trick people into thinking I have an upper body.
2. Grocery Shopping: Any plant that grows in the world will be at my fingertips. Kashi will return to it's rightful place in my diet. Skim milk will exist again. Perhaps most importantly, I'll be able to eat real peanut butter again.
3. A Real Home: TV. American TV. A bed that isn't just a mattress held up by four wooden pegs, in a bedroom I don't have to share - that has a bathroom that I don't have to share. A fully functional kitchen. Heat. Adequate lighting = no more reading by candlelight. Functioning wireless.
4. Texting: I didn't realize how much I enjoyed my cell phone until I didn't have it. I miss being able to shoot off a text when I see something ridiculously hysterical. I'll be able to get ahold of people now without having to worry about surcharges, unreasonable rates, or time zones.
5. Famiglia e Amici! Of course the best part... I guess, right? I kid, I kid. I'm very excited to be home with everyone.

So what's on the docket for this evening? Glad you asked. After I finish my last final, I'm off to throw the last few things in my bags, then out for my last authentic Italian dinner. After that, I think we'll probably pop open a bottle of champagne in the piazza, and sit around enjoying the Christmas tree and the carousel, perhaps dancing to street music. With any luck I may end up going out for one last night at the discotheque, only to make it back to the apartment with enough time for a brief nap before waking up at 6am to head to the airport! It's going to be a long 36 hours until I finally make it home. Say a little prayer for me! Talk to you all soon!

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Homeward Bound" Yazge

P.S. - You can bet I won't be posting from the airports tomorrow. No way I'm getting charged another $20!

Che posso fare?

THE SAGA CONTINUES!

Some time yesterday, I received the following comment on the blog post in which I discuss my horrible experience with Boingo:

"I’m sorry to hear that you had a frustrating experience with us. We want you to be happy with Boingo, and we certainly don’t try to sneak anything past our customers. (We love puppies!)

Would you please send me an email at lsanyal at boingo dot com with your account information? We’ll take a look into your account and try to determine what happened. I’d definitely like to help resolve this concern for you. Thank you for your candid feedback!"


First off, I'm SHOCKED that they have someone scanning the internet for consumer complaints. This leads me to believe one of two things: 1) Boingo is seriously committed to customer service, or 2) There's a bigger problem that's causing them to put out fires before it becomes a bigger public issue. So after doing some digging around the internet, I found out that apparently the e-mail address is legit. It's on their Facebook Page, their Twitter, and several third party consumer complaint websites. So I decided to send lsanyal an e-mail trying to confirm that it is in fact a Boingo employee and not some random person perusing the internet trying to cause me more trouble. Also, I apologized for the puppy comment. That was a low blow. Funny that she mentioned it though. Gold star.


Will keep you updated.




Ciao Bella!


Matteo "Puppy 'poligizer" Yazge

Uno scherzo con Nuova Luna

Disgracing Vampires everywhere...

So on behalf of Transylvanians everywhere, I'd like to call out the Twilight series. That's not how we do it. We don't suck the blood out of people. We may slowly kill our family members with intolerably boring stories or peculiarly horrible guilt trips, but never once do we pierce the skin. We leave that to the Hungarians.

Anyway, I was wandering around the Italian YouTube site, and I found this video. Even if you don't understand Italian, please watch it. It's hilarious. Huge spoof, great physical comedy.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Vampiro" Yazge

Ti Amo, Lucy

You got some 'splain-in' to do!

I was trying to avoid studying for my Business Law final, and I found this video. Apparently Lucy came to Italy too. I don't know why I wasn't offered to stomp grapes with an old peasant woman, but I'd like to think that my feet could do some serious damage. Maybe work in some choreography too. Anyway, enjoy the clip! I did!


Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Loves Lucy" Yazge

Michele, Davide, e Galileo

He's starting to let himself go...

So my apologies. Apparently there are five of you that read my little stories - 6 if I include my mother. That's just judging by yesterday's comments and such. Google analytics keeps telling me that there are roughly 15-30 people who visit every day, depending on what I write about/how often I write. But I think it's just lying to me so I don't feel bad.

Regardless! I've been trying to soak up the last bits of Florence while I'm here. I went to La Galleria dell'Academia on Friday, and started off by perusing some old religious panels. I quickly got bored. If it's not Byzantine, I'm not really impressed, and even then I can only take so many Madonnas with Child before it becomes monotonous. So I wandered into the next gallery for something completely different: Robert Maplethorpe. I know people think his photos are distasteful and pornographic, but when you look at them in the context of what he was trying to accomplish, it's completely different. (Click here to see selections) It was all about form, and displaying real human bodies that can live up to the standard set forth in sculpture and other forms of art. It was about all of us being able to be just as beautiful as the David - without photoshopping him into obesity, like above. Anyway, I really enjoyed the exhibit.

As soon as I left the Maplethorpe exhibit, I ran right into the David. It took my breath away. It's SO life-like. I don't even know how to describe it, except to say that I kept waiting for him to reach out and pick me up in the palm of his hand, that's how alive he seemed.

Yesterday, in keeping with my goal of marinading myself in Florence, I went to La Basilica della Santa Croce. I just went because everyone told me that I should. They all failed to mention that Galileo, Michelangelo, Machiavelli, Rossini, and Marconi are all entombed there. Go figure. Not exactly religious icons - in fact Galileo was convicted of heresy and put under house arrest by the Pope (unjustly, but still). It was odd to see all these cultural icons in the church. Awesome, but odd. Especially since I've walked past the church a hundred times and had no idea until yesterday that it housed some of the greatest individuals in Italian history.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Sculpted di Dio" Yazge

CENTO!!!

100 posts, and I'm still this adorable...

Yup! This is my 100th post! It feels like a lot more, but that could be because I'm tired/my brain is threatening to pack its bags and leave.

It's really good timing for my 100th post, the end of my semester in Italy. An end of an era, really. Let's take a look back and remember the wonderful topics we've discussed:

Travel: Paris, London, Italy, beyond...

Crazy People: Oprah, Lindsay Lohan, Berlusconi, and more!

Food: Turkey, Waffles, Risotto...

Music: Opera, British Pop Stars, and singing nuns...

I've also come the realization (after 100 posts, and roughly 200 days) that you can't start off famous. That's too easy, and not quite as fun. I'd again like for all of us to look to the great Kathy Griffin for inspiration. You must claw, bite, scratch, and shamelessly self-promote yourself to the top. Publicity stunts, gimmicks, and first amendment lawyers are all essential to this process, and I fully intend to take full advantage of the fact that I (normally) live in a metropolitan area that hosts all the country's major networks. So when you see my mug shot on the 6 o'clock news, you can say "Oh, well I was reading his blog before it was cool." Thank you, all 4 of you, who read this and understand the necessary steps of obscurity and infamy that eventually lead to fame. This is for you. Well, really it's about me getting famous, but you get the idea.

Now get excited for all the good stuff to come! Here's just a list of some of the things you can look forward to in the coming days, weeks, and months:

• Christmas Countdown!
• My reintegration into the US (shame-based Wal-mart excursions and all)
• Classic American Movie marathons
• Exploring the outer boroughs
• World Cup anticipation
• Matt Looks for a Job: an in depth analysis of procrastination at its best
• Ridiculous videos possibly featuring Baby Lexi
• and MUCH MUCH MORE!!!!

Did that get you excited enough? Good. Because it should.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Centurian" Yazge

Wireless Diavolo

This company is Satan... just look at the red.

SO! I was in the airport on my way home from Paris last weekend, and miraculously there was an wireless channel that was open. It didn't require a password or anything. Go figure. So I was like "dude, I'm totally using this". Mala idea.

This morning I opened my e-mail to find one from boingo, an evil, conniving company that probably kicks puppies. PUPPIES! I got charged $20 for less than an hour's worth of wireless! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? I'm seeing red right now. I'm debating whether or not I should call and complain. I'm sure they're going to fall back on some fine print nonsense. I used their service, as in actually signed up for and paid for and hour's worth of service when I was in JFK. They told me how much it was going to be, and showed me the bill before I clicked the "I agree" button. But there was nothing like that on my screen. I doubt they'll agree to give me any money back... Bastards.

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Wire- (and $20)-less" Yazge

Nove

Awesomeness in movie form.

This film, based on the original Broadway musical, isn't slated to come out until late January... but that hasn't stopped me from watching the trailer 20 times over, hoping that the next it will be the actual movie. I'm not sure if it's my newly-developed affinity for Italy, or my overwhelming desire to take Dame Judy Dench out for a night on the town. Either way, I'm anxious for this movie to come out. Anyone want to go with?

Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Cinema Italiano" Yazge

Avviciniamo la fine

Thessaloniki gave a whole new meaning to the word "portly"

So close to the end of the semester. I'm only in Italy for another 10 days, and I'm trying to find the right way to describe the cocktail of emotions that I'm feeling right now. I'm pretty sure it's a vodka-Red Bull. The vodka, clearly European, is making me sleepy. I'm trying to make it to the end of semester and get everything done, get my A's, etc. But it also make me want to hang out. I know I'm going to miss Europe a lot. Firenze and Italy as well, but moreso the general idea of Europe. There's still so much I haven't seen. I was going to go to Rome this weekend, but after looking at my credit card statement this morning, I've decided that maybe a relaxing final weekend in Florence might be a better idea. I never made it to Spain. I won't even fly through Germany, nor did I get anywhere near Scandinavia. Even after going to Paris twice in the course of a month, I feel like I've only just begun to see it, let alone the rest of France.

But then the Red Bull kicks in. I'm really really REALLY ready to get back to the family, and to a full-sized bed, and the convenience of life in America. Oh, and functioning plumbing. I didn't share this earlier, but on Thanksgiving night the city of Florence shut off the water. For the ENTIRE CITY. They said there was something that needed fixing and that it was midnight so that seemed like a good time. Then yesterday I get a call from Jamie while I'm at work that our bathroom had flooded. Our ceiling was leaking. I'd like to take a moment to point out that we live on the third floor of a five floor building, and our bathroom has no external walls... so despite what the Italian plumber may have told us, it was not due to the torrential rain outside. If it was, the Italians need to learn a thing or two about masonry.

Posting will most likely be sporadic for the next week or so. It's finals time, and I'm lucky to even be awake right now. Those of you who are used to talking to me on a daily basis know that I disappear during midterms and finals. But while I'm gone, I'll give you a topic: What should my blog focus on when I get back to the States?

Discuss.


Ciao Bella!

Matteo "Vodka-Red Bull" Yazge